There are plenty of obvious — and not so obvious — signs your job is ruining your marriage.
If you’re getting the sense that’s the case, you’ll want to do everything you can to turn things around before it’s too late.
“By recognizing the early symptoms and being proactive, you can better learn to separate work from your personal life — and be successful in both,” says Lynn Taylor, a national workplace expert and the author of “Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant: How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job.”
Michael Kerr, an international business speaker and author of “The Humor Advantage,” agrees. “You want to recognize red flags early that your work is impacting your marriage so you aren’t blindsided by your spouse before it’s too late to make any changes.”
Here’s what to do when you realize your job might be ruining your marriage:
Be honest with yourself about what’s happening.
The first step to dealing the a problem like this is acknowledging it.
If you think work is spilling into your personal life too often, it probably is. “You may be fortunate enough to have a partner who has a high tolerance to ‘feeling your pain,’ but that doesn’t mean it’s not affecting them personally,” says Taylor.
Take greater responsibility and accountability.
“It will give you greater confidence if you begin doing some soul-searching and self reflection,” she says. “Create alone time just for that purpose. Analyze the difficulties you’re having at work. You may need to commit them to paper or record them onto your smartphone. When you read about or listen to the issues as an outsider, you can be more objective and definitive about solutions.”
Try to train yourself to draw a better line between work and home. Consider leaving a reminder note somewhere visible in your home, such as “Fun,” or “Unplug,” Taylor suggests.